The Superhero Parody
by Twinxie
Summary: The Gundam Wing cast goes Superhero. Warnings and closer info in the first chapter.
1. Intro

[An empty theatre stage. Nothing but red velvet-curtains are seen. A boy with blonde, ruffled hair, blue stonewashed jeans and a T-shirt with the text 'My sister went to London and all I got was this lousy T-shirt' on it, is pushed to the stage through the curtains.]  
  
Foxie: [from off-stage] Do as you're told to!  
  
[The boy looks around for a while, looking confused. Then he takes a deep breath and nods towards the audience.]  
  
The Boy: [is reading directly from a pile of cards in his hands] Hi! My name is Eep- What the…?  
  
Foxie: It's your new online-name. Now get on with it.  
  
Eep: Okay… So my name –apparently- is Eep and I'm Foxie's little brother. [Puts down the cards and looks into the audience in despair] Please help me! I'm not doing this freely.  
  
Twinkie: [also from off-stage] Shut up, over there! We have the skateboard in here!  
  
Foxie: And the drumsticks!  
  
Eep: [eeps] I am here to warn you about the many scary things this piece of FanFiction written by Foxie and Twinkie -see, my sister is so self centered she always puts her name first- contains. Those two maniacs have my skateboard and drumsticks as hostages so that is why I am doing this.  
  
Twinkie: Stop whining or the board'll crack!  
  
Foxie: And the drumsticks!  
  
Eep: [looks horrified] So, first of all, this fic contains usage of anime characters for the authoresses' own sick amusement, yaoi – good GOD! Does that mean what I think it means?  
  
Foxie: Yes it does. Don't act homophobe when you're not one.   
  
Eep: [shudders] Relena bashing – she must be the evil bitch of this series, right? – foul language, multiple chapters, terrible humor, loads of PINK, yaoi – Foxie, you wrote it here twice! – and many other things that don't deserve a warning of their own. Just remember that if you are traumatized, those two [points somewhere around the back of the stage] will nothing but be happy.  
  
Twinkie & Foxie: Indeed!  
  
Eep: [sighs] So here is their Superhero Parody that has a damn long name and I'm not able to waste my breath to read it.   
  
Foxie: [Runs to the stage with the skateboard and throws it to some roundabout direction] Fetch!  
  
[Eep runs]  
  
Twinkie: [Also enters the stage with a pretty suffered-looking paper in her hands] Gotta admit that even *I* don't remember the name by heart so… It seems to be: 'The Magical World of Hunky Super Heroes and Evil Bitchy Villains Who Will Be Defeated in the End as if You Didn't Know It Already – But if You didn't, We're Sorry For Spoiling the Story for You'.  
  
Foxie: Or You can just call it 'TMWoHSHaEBVWWBDitEaiYDKIA' for short. Pronounce it as you wish.  
  
Twinkie: [pokes Foxie on the ribs and whispers something]  
  
Foxie: Why do you always have to be right? Okay, so if either one of those god-awfully long names doesn't fit your liking, you can always call this 'The Superhero Parody', as we do.   
  
Twinkie: Yes, now it is time for you…  
  
Foxie & Twinkie: Enjoy the Show!  
  
[Fanfares, balloons, dancing turtles and lions]  
  
[The curtains close and the story is ready to begin.] 


	2. Episode 1

Episode One,   
Where Our Heroes Are Assigned for a New Job  
  
"And here we heard the brand new, smash-hit band 'The Pink Honeyz' and their latest hit single 'Baby, Buy Me Bubblegum'. I have to say, that these ladies really know how to make a groovy song and aren't holding back while doing music! Their last single has been holding the number one position on each chart and their next single, reportedly named as 'I Like it in Pink', will be released next week. I myself must say that I'm looking forward to it!  
  
Oh, my, as I glance at my watch I see that it is time to hear the top headlines as of today! I don't think it's a surprise that the Fashion House Fuchsia's newest collection presentation is the hottest subject today. The Fashion House has a new designer and her style is something really amazing, they say. As we have had the chance to take a peek to the up-coming collection, I can inform you, that for sure, the following Spring's and Summer's color will be Pink, once again. And it ain't wonder! I myself never get bored to the shades of light pink!  
  
From fashion to our stylish Queen of the World, Relena Peacecraft, who has recently ended her six-month travel through the colonies. During her travels the polls about her support were made and each of them only showed that she is more popular than ever! There really is a politician to my tastes, I might say. Miss Relena has announced that she will be having a break for a day, to recover from the obvious stress being a charming leader to the whole wide world has brought to her. Send her 'get well soon'-cards and we will have her back at her feet in no time!   
  
Now we must move on with the music and next on the line is the BPBB's (BabyPink BoyBand) song 'Candyfloss Clouds'. Enjoy it!"  
  
Une threw a look of disgust to the radio on her desk and hit the 'Off' switch. She was tired of hearing about pink fashions, pink bands, music that was covered with pink and the most of all, about the 'charming Queen of the World'. As if it wasn't enough everyone was talking about the aforementioned subjects in the streets and offices but the radio had to spit them out, too.   
  
There would have been so many more important things to talk about, but for some reason people didn't see them anymore. It was as if they had all been blindfolded with pink scarves and deafened with bubblegum-pop. Une was wondering, in all honesty, why hadn't the same happened to her too. Perhaps it was because of the fact that her personality was somewhat complicated and not easily corrupted with momentary trends.   
  
The phone on the desk rang and with a sigh, Une picked it up.   
  
"Hello."  
  
Silence. Then…  
  
"She's done it."  
  
Une felt her heart try to escape through her throat.  
  
"You are not serious."  
  
"Almost two thirds of the people support Pink."  
  
"We should have been able to predict this. I never thought it would happen this fast."  
  
"Our plans are all useless now. There is only one choice left."  
  
Une sighed.  
  
"Get them on the line."  
  
"Are you sure?"  
  
"Dammit, don't question! Just do as I say!"  
  
"Yes."   
  
Une listened to the click that followed when the phone was hung up. She hadn't expected this; not this fast, it was impossible. Their enemy had been proven to be smarter than expected. Of course, She had done unexpected things before. Maybe that was why all their predictions had gone wrong.  
  
Her computer screen turned black and a dialing tone was heard. Une turned towards the screen, taking a deep breath before the action began.   
  
With electric blue letters the two characters 'G5' appeared on the screen. After they were gone, a face of a young, bright-eyed boy with chestnut brown hair became visible. Number Two; Une identified the boy.  
  
"Yo! Long time no see!" the boy greeted Une and smiled a wide, honest smile.   
  
"Are you all in there?" Une asked, not bothering to reply the greeting.  
  
"All five of us, yeah. You wanna talk to Hee- Number One?"  
  
"If that is possible, yes."  
  
The boy on the screen nodded and then disappeared. There was a faint sound of a conversation in the background and Une could swore she heard someone tell some other one to 'get your pants on and get the phone', but then came to the conclusion that all this stress just made her hear things.  
  
After a moment another boy, not much older than the previous one, appeared on screen. He, unlike the Number Two, had serious, convincing appearances, aside from the few strands of dark brown hair that seemed to be a little out of control.  
  
"Yes," the boy said, rather than asked.  
  
"You have an assignment."  
  
"Another world conqueror?"  
  
"The Pink."  
  
The boy shuddered, as if in disgust and muttered something like 'oh, her'. Then he got himself together, again.  
  
"Any details?"  
  
"Make her stop, no matter how. That is all I am asking you to do."  
  
"So, we are allowed to bake her with beans and then feed the remains to the birds?"   
  
Une stared.   
  
"I said 'no matter how', didn't I."  
  
"Roykai," the boy said and the screen turned to black again, until it returned to normal.   
  
Une leaned back in her chair, feeling a nasty headache approaching. What the hell had she just done? She wondered if this really was the only way, only having to acknowledge it being the sad truth.   
  
'May God help us all', she thought and stood up to get a cup of strong coffee.   
  
~ In the G5 headquarters ~  
  
Quatre Raberba Winner, Number Four by his pseudonym, carried a tray with five teacups and a teapot. He laid the tray to a coffee table in between the two sofas where the rest of the five were sitting and the sat down himself.   
  
"I don't understand the task we are given," he admitted and poured himself a cup of tea before continuing: "What is so wrong with bringing masses of people together just through a single color?"  
  
"If the masses are manipulated to worship the color and the one who has brought it to them, it is wrong. It is taking away the freedom of choice. Injustice, in one word," Chang Wufei, Number Five, replied having a cup of tea for himself, too.   
  
"Is there any coffee? The target makes me shudder," the Number One, Heero Yuy, who had spoken to Une a moment back, asked and when given a negative answer, growled and went to make a nice pot of black, strong coffee.   
  
"Wu-man's right. We can't let that psycho bitch manipulate people," Duo, the few lines back mentioned widely smiling boy agreed. He threw his arms behind his neck and yawned. "Besides, we've had no real action in ages. It's about friggin' time for something to come up."   
  
"Maybe, yes, but I still don't see what is so wrong with pink," Quatre argued politely.   
  
The others stared.   
  
"Q, what is BPBB?" Duo asked, looking skeptically at Quatre.  
  
"BabyPink BoyBand, why?"  
  
Duo breathed deeply, as if trying to keep himself from hyperventilating. "Name one of their songs," he ordered.  
  
"Candyfloss Clouds, but I really don't see what you're trying to say."  
  
"NO! They've got you too!" Duo yelled in agony and jumped up from his seat. "Pull yourself together, man! Don't give in, there is still hope left! You can get help, we are all here to help you!"  
  
Now the others turned to stare at Duo.  
  
"No one has gotten me. I am just aware of the things that happen around me, just as you seem to be," Quatre explained and took a sip from his tea. "I know well enough not to fall into traps like hers."  
  
Duo sighed in relief and sat back down.   
  
During this brief encounter, Heero had returned with a cup of coffee and after having stared at the braided, panic-stricken boy for a while and then downed the insides of his cup causing himself to nearly choke, he opened his mouth.   
  
"We need to be prepared for everything She-" Heero shuddered "- might try. So keep your eye's open, will you."  
  
The four others nodded in understanding and simultaneously emptied their teacups.   
  
TBC…   
  
| This chapter was written by Foxie. The next one will be done by Twinkie, and there is no guarantee when it will be up. Bomb us with e-mail (anime_rakuen@hotmail.com) if you think she's too slow… | 


End file.
